[x]

ConvictedAs I lay here in my bed.
I lay awake wondering.
Thinking of death.
Coldest soul.
Glacier froze.
Emotions cold.
Insides stole.
Stolen and broken.
Heart steady choking.
Heartbreak soaking.
Into all that is humanity.
The life that was meant to be.
Promises.
Lied so sweet.
Packaged.
Frozen treat.
Eat his heart.
Sealing eternity.
Healing.
To only bleed.
Again.
From the inside.
Broken record begins.
Leaving infinite.
Happiness is my sin.

His WarYou look at my arms and ask me why
You thought I was better
You thought I was alright
But as I trace
Those fine, red lines
I whisper so softly
It's almost a sigh
"No, no
I'm perfectly fine

"But in his sorrow he is caught
He has tear stains in his eyes
From the wars he fought
He lets out a terrible cry
For the things he's sought
So how can I be happy
When he is not?"

Why.Why am I the only one in pain ?
Why do I always get the blame ?
I know I do everything wrong,
But i’m trying my hardest to stay strong.
Why can’t these feelings just go away ?
It keeps haunting me day by day.

Will you...Will you?

Will you love me,
Always?
Even when I'm anger,
Or sad.

Will you listen,
When I want to rant?
Talk,
To fill the silence.

Will you hug me,
When I need one?
Kiss me,
When I want you to.

Will you be my friend?
My Love?
My Heart?
And my other half?

Will you care for me,
When I'm sick.
Hold me,
When I'm upset.

Everyone needs that special someone, if you don't have one then don't worry. They're out there somewhere.

BattlefieldOnce again i've returned to the one place I hate the most,

Where nothing but screams & blood are present.

The sky lays above my head pitch black,

Nothing peaceful here, only deadly content.

Dried blood rests across my face,

My wounds throughout my body remain unhealed.

I hate being in this place,

Where my demons, are revealed.

Even though i'm tired,

And my heart feels as if it's going to give up on me soon.

I must keep fighting this battle,

I'm not sure of what else to do.

As the underdog that I am,

I will continue to play this game and somewhat stay strong.

It's hard to stay positive here,

This is the one place I know I don't

That person.Looking for someone who cares,
Waiting until that person appears.
So i’m sitting here, waiting.
Thinking off you,
I wish my dreams would come true.
Maybe you’re that person,
The one who will care.
But probably not,
Because if you where, you would be here, with me.
And then I wouldn’t have to miss you.
But know I do..
So i’m sitting here, waiting.
Waiting until that person appears,
The one who cares.

UnnoticedUnnoticed

It seems like I’ve become see threw
Like I’m just not there
Except for when I’m in trouble
I can’t seem to find how that’s fair

Maybe it’s cause I’m the middle child
Or that I don’t have a special skill
Maybe I don’t cause enough problems
Will she notice me if I were to kill?

Whatever the case may be
I seem to always be out shined
By a sister who loves and cares
And a brother who’s dumb and blind

Mother just doesn’t see me
I feel like I’ve been tossed away
A machine with not heart
Only able to obey

I’ve become a drone
Not actually a part
Of this perfect little family
Silly drone you’re not so smart

For thinking she would notice you
For thinking she would care
For a screw up like you
Love you? She wouldn’t dare

No she doesn’t love you
She only loves her boy
You’re just here to do the chores
Just her cleaning little toy

Esas madrugadas llenas de pensEsas madrugadas llenas de pensamientos rodeando mi cabeza como enredaderas unidas unas con otras, donde pienso real y no emocional, donde tu me cegaste y me tiraste a mi suerte, donde ahora me levanto solo, donde ahora tu te encuentras en el cielo, pero pronto caerás, recuerda las nubes no son de hierro.

CaptivityCaptivity

I sit there alone in darkness. No one comes to rescue me. Why would they? Were locked up in Captivity. The Devil fills our minds with Sadness. We can never escape Captivity. Everyone walks by. They stop and stare and we are angered. Because they're free and were not. It begins to unleash that feeling that cages inside us. I took the knife and ran it across my soft skin. I bleed and bleed with a smile on my face. "Im finally free im sorry guys goodbye".

Red EyeDon't go through the dust storm unless you want to catch
red eye
Don't go to the nice eccentric people unless you want your
head dyed
Don't go to the pink mist unless you are eager to
die
Don't go to 'Delphia unless you want to get caught by
Red Eye.

With the gaze of him you find transfixed
your disposition of him utterly mixed
is he truly up to his ingenious tricks?
or is it obvious he is truly sick?

to the clouds above lay what was a town
red like him as is his disciples all around
to mine and coal to his bidding to lose what is not found
but nevertheless they are eager and honorbound

But there are some
who doubt my insight
but of those

Random poemLong ago there was place very far away
the place was ruled by a evil queen who was only age fourteen
she held deep respect for her servant and her tool
and was blinded by the peasants cries for food
Josephine was her horse's name
and the land of the riches is what she claimed
The servant went into a neighboring town and fell for a girl
her eyes shone like a green pearl
telling his queen, she whispers so no one can hear
"Make sure she doesn't interfere"
Meeting the girl in green in the forest of eve, the servant cries as the girl who once shone like a green pearl...
has now disappeared from the world
the kingdom starts to burn to the ground a

figureI'm trying to figure out what I'm doing wrong. Because I've learned- if something is wrong- fix it. Don't pity yourself, don't complain to others. But honestly it's so fucking hard when I have no idea what I'm doing wrong. I'm so fucking stressed by all the people around me, no one ever listens when I say enough is enough. I just want to dig myself a cave and live there for a good fucking while.

1If I were to speak to you,
Will you notice me?
With those shining glasses of yours
Will you really see?
That I have a void in my soul
And a heart so black
But the smile on your face
Can bring the light back.
Let me ask you, only once,
Do you feel the same?
I think not, because I know
You do not know my name.
It’s quite silly, really,
How I am fond of you,
And how I hope so dearly
That you’re fond of me too.

You have nothing to fear, I'm mental.I guess this time it really is my fault
I am usually the one to blame
It seems I'm the one in the wrong
I'm obviously not perfectly sane.

My mind is not completely stable
I must be unknowingly mental
My sanity has long disappeared
Your part was obviously accidental

Please don't care enough to help me
After all, your the one who put me here
Just leave me in the dark and get away
Get away before you have anything to fear.

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More from *Aki-Lesete

to late for answersi met someone who was about to die
so i sat down and started to cry
but through my tears i realized
that someone had not closed his eyes
so i started to ask questions i had to know
and my tears soon stopped their flow
is life worth living?
should you spend your life giving?
is the world as beautiful as they say?
is life a game that we should all play?
are the good times worth the bad?
are peoples lives mostly sad?
is death as peaceful as we think?
are peoples sanity pushed to the brink?
and i kept asking questions as the time flied
but my questions weren't answered because he died

books always endI always skip to the end of a book before I read it. I’ve never known why.
I guess because, if it turns out to be sad, I don’t want to cry
And if it ends well, then I have hope for the rest
Because books with happy endings usually turn out the best.

Why go through the misery of sadness and things going wrong
You can check how it will end before it all, so why prolong?
why take the time to read a book just to end upset
if you can check first and have your own safety net

why live life when it ends with death
if after a while you take your last breath
there’s no point in living, can’t you see?
Oh wait, we were talking about books, weren’t we?

dude, he's highDude, he’s high.
High on his pedestal,
Afraid to come down
And walk along with the rest of us
With his head in the clouds
Holding on to his dreams
Afraid to let go
With clouds made of smoke
And rain made of tears
Trying his best
To hold onto hope

denialHey, where are you? we had a party for you yesterday. you always loved the color black, didn't you? even though when you didn't show up, people cried, don’t worry because I trust you. something probably came up. We had this small rectangular box-like table with flowers for you on it. And your picture too. And I’m sure you are laughing right now. You always were vain, like when you said that people didn't like taking pictures of you, the camera’s were just drawn to your magnetic beauty. And you were right. You were beautiful. Your eyes that sparkled whenever you smiled; like you knew a little secret that only you knew. That smile shined brighter than the sun. that was the smile you had in that picture. Anyways, where are you? I want to see that smile again…
…
hey, it’s been, like, a week? Where are you? your family is worried for you. are you okay? I know you are, but why haven’t you called? Your parents

laugh and smileif someone tells you that you should die

laugh
because that person doesn't know
that your already dead inside
if someone tells you that you are ugly
smile
because that person doesn't know
that they're saying that to a mirror

i am a roseIf I was a rose, I would be happy. Because I would be well loved and beautiful. Unfortunately, I would also be delicate. But if I were a rose I would have no problem with my life. I would be perfect. Until that day when part of who I am falls to the ground and gets blown away. And as days past, more and more of who I am will fall, reveling who I really am. Just a plain, ugly, dying stem of a rose. Simply nothing…

I am not a rose, but there really isn't much of a difference. We both hide who we really are behind a beautiful mask. Both of us; easily broken. And as each day goes by, a little part of that beautiful mask falls away, leaving nothing but a plain, ugly, dying soul.
So I guess…
I might just be that rose…

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Submitted: November 24, 2012
Submitted with: Sta.sh Writer

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i am not crazy

by *Aki-Lesete, Nov 24, 2012, 8:58:03 PM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Concrete Poetry

i heard them say there was nothing they could do.

they say that i am crazy, but i swear it isn't true.

so what if i hear voices in my head, they say i'm not crazy.

and i'm not too paralyzed to move, i'm just a little lazy.

and i don't kill people, people just die around me.

and they aren't really dead, they're just sleeping soundly

i don't stab people, they just run into the knifes i'm holding.

and i don't break peoples bones, its just their bodies folding.

i don't have victims, i just want to see people take their last breath.

and i'm not a murder, i just have a fascination with death.

so fine, have it your way, lock me up and throw away the key

just know that you people are the crazy ones, defiantly not me...

i am not crazyby *Aki-Lesete

Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Concrete Poetry

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~LittleGothDoll Jan 9, 2013 Traditional Artist

I can really relate to this poem--i like it alot.

*Aki-Lesete Jan 9, 2013

thank you very much. i appreciate it

~LittleGothDoll Jan 9, 2013 Traditional Artist

No problem--I love to red good poetry

~DeaththePuppy Jan 2, 2013 Hobbyist Writer

Reminds me of what people thought of me when I was younger.

*Aki-Lesete Jan 2, 2013

that sucks

~DeaththePuppy Jan 2, 2013 Hobbyist Writer

It was interesting to say the least

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i am not crazy

i am not crazyby *Aki-Lesete

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